Cuddy's Thirteen
by catsandsvu
Summary: Cuddy and Thirteen both find out something that will change their lives. With one man between the two of them, who wants no part in this - will they turn to or against each other? Rated T. Probably will change here and there. Reviews.  :


"Good evening. I'm Dr. House. So glad you get to meet me." House limped in the patient's room with his cane. Cameron struggled under the hallucinating patient's grasp around her throat. "Someone's having a bit of a tantrum." He noted. House took out a needle with 10cc's of Propofol, and jammed it into the patient's leg. Cameron was released, as the patient relaxed into a forced sleep. She rubbed her neck, and nodded once in thanks. House picked up a little bag with flour-looking substance from under the blankets beside the patient.

"Hallucinations, seizing, blindness, and cardiac arrest. Test him for Benzoylmethyl Ecgonine overdose. Next time, instead of being true to your roots," House nodded at Cameron's blonde hair, "let's try picking out the obvious before the picking out the serious." He walked back out of the room, and toward his office. Cuddy caught up to him in the hallway.

"17 year old female, vomiting, says it's been going for days. Migraine and muscular fatigue. Missed her menstrual cycle." Cuddy said handing House the patient's file.

"She's pregnant. Have her pee in a cup and swish a stick in it. When it turns blue, congratulate her for being a good Catholic girl. It's not my day for clinic duty." He said five steps from his office.

"We tried. She won't give consent for us to do so. She claims she's never slept with anyone." Cuddy tiredly stated.

"-scoffs- Can't I ever do my job?" House sarcastically complained.

"You are-"

"No, no. MY job is telling people what to do. Not doing the work firsthand. I'm just the brilliant mind behind it all." House nodded, and handed Cuddy the file. He took another step toward his office, and she grabbed his arm.

"No, that's my job. Go." Cuddy shoved the file at his chest, and pointed to the direction of the room the patient was in. House scoffed.

House barged into the examination room, where the girl sat on the table.

"Samantha." He closed her file and pulled a cup from the side of the sink. "My name is Dr. House. Pee in this cup, or I can do a pelvic exam to make sure your innocence is intact." He offered with no hint of sarcasm.

"I don't give consent for either." She stubbornly argued, running her fingers through her blonde hair. House put the cup down.

"Unfortunate for you, your home telephone number is 555-0783." House raised an eyebrow, and the girl looked up at him. "Here are your two options. One, pee in the cup. Two, I have all your information. I call up your parents, let them know the situation, and you go home a sad teenage mother who should've cooperated with the nice, egotistical doctor." He handed her the cup. "Bathroom's right there." He pointed at the wooden door as he popped Vicodin into his mouth, and limped out of the room. He watched the girl go into the bathroom from the corner of his eye, and walked away with a check mark on the file. A few wandering nurses roamed around, unentertained. Other than that, nobody was in the clinic. Slow day, he thought. He walked into his office and turned on his television.

Thirteen stood outside Cuddy's office, biting down on her lower lip and wringing her hands. It was either now or never. They were both professionals. And she couldn't tell Chase, or Taub, or Foreman. And she could not tell House. She could trust Lisa Cuddy, if nothing else.

Cuddy stood in the middle of her office, holding her head. She swayed back and forth with dizziness. Was the girl in the clinic convincing enough? Did she resist long enough to convince House _she _was pregnant, when in fact she isn't? Did she tell House she was getting Cuddy's urine tested instead of her own, despite Cuddy's paying her? Cuddy sat down and calm and reason began to flood her, and so did the water in her eyes. She wiped the tears that kept falling on her skirt, and she leaned forward in sobs. Three light taps on the door startled her into emotional sobriety and she quickly wiped all trace of water and looked up. She raised an eyebrow and waved Thirteen in.

"A..Are you okay?" Thirteen asked Cuddy as she slowly closed the doors.

"Yeah, I'm okay. What is it?" She waved off Thirteen's question with her hand.

"Just wanted to say hi… You know, since it's a slow work day."

"Oh."

A moment of awkward silence crept into the room. At the same time they looked at each other and opened their mouth.

"No, please. You first." Thirteen politely allowed.

"No, it's okay. Go ahead."

Somewhere in this, they both opened their mouths and at the same time said the same sentences.

"I think I'm pregnant." They confessed at the same time.

"You what?" They yelled once again in unison.

"Who's is it?" Lisa asked Thirteen.

"Who's yours? Or, rather, possibly yours?" Thirteen asked back.

"House." Cuddy breathed quietly.

"Oh my god." Thirteen whispered, her eyes widened. Lisa tried to process what she just heard. Trying to comprehend. They locked eyes for a half second, when House walked in. Both women collapsed.


End file.
